Round 14 - Hawthorn v Collingwood

MCG, Saturday 21 June 2014

Let’s Do The Time Warp – Footy on Saturday afternoon

Game times for matches at Brazil 2014 are extremely inconvenient for those of us living on the eastern Australian seaboard. Matches are scheduled to commence at 2.00am or 4.00am – too late to stay up; too early to get up, and there’s some at 7.30am when we’re already on our way to work. Hardly conducive to easy viewing. 

So it was refreshing to find this Hawthorn Collingwood match scheduled for 2.10 on a Saturday afternoon – the first Hawks match for the season in Melbourne in this the traditional timeslot. And lo and behold: 70,000 people turned up to watch! 

One fears however, that the AFL is taking note of the popularity of the World Cup and is perhaps considering a Wednesday 2.00am timeslot. After all, they’re now proposing a Good Friday game, although interestingly they are saying it may be too early to schedule one for next season – what, it takes 18 months to work that into the fixture? You could actually decide the night before – in fact that might be the best way to determine which teams should play.  Several clubs are squabbling in a rather unseemly manner over the right to play on this day – not Hawthorn it should be pointed out – so perhaps the first two teams to turn up to the MCG on the day with full kit should be given the right to just go for it. 

It’s probably fortunate that this match was commencing at 2.10pm, because I may not have got there had it been any later. The night previous I’d been to a big dinner to celebrate a milestone birthday – let’s just say it’s a number so high no Hawthorn player has ever worn it – and it’s fair to say I was a little ‘tired and emotional’ on the night. By the time I got to the ground I was just tired, so had it been any later it’s likely I would have been asleep. As such I was hoping for a gentle game, something I could watch in relative ease with just a modicum of barracking required of me. 

Holding the Ball explained

If only those Collingwood fans could have kept it down. All that booing!

There has been much confusion over the ‘Holding the Ball’ rule in recent weeks, with various commentators, even coaches and players expressing frustration over the different interpretations that umpires bring to it.

In this match the three controlling umpires seemed to reach some sort of consensus about how the rule should be applied. I think I speak for all Hawthorn fans when I say that we all benefited from this clarification. All such decisions were adjudicated in a clear and correct manner: if a Collingwood player was caught with the ball, and didn’t make a purposeful attempt to dispose of it correctly, then it was ruled to be a Hawthorn free kick. Fair enough too. If, however, a Hawthorn player was caught with the ball, regardless of his pantomime act to clear it, the umpire ruled that there was no prior opportunity to dispose of it and called for a ball up. Now what’s confusing about that? Sounds to me like they tapped into a universal law. You would think that bringing such clarity to this contested rule would satisfy everyone, but Collingwood fans gave fairly regular voice to their disapproval.  

Likewise when Collingwood’s Scott Pendlebury was penalised for a throw, which led to a crucial Hawthorn goal. Replays may well have revealed it to be a handball rather than a throw, but again, people are trying to put too literal interpretation on the decision; sometimes the umpire has to adjudicate in the spirit of the game rather than like some automaton simply applying rules. 

Hip hip hooray…it’s Hawthorn

Another universal law dictates that Rough should kick our first and this he did. I missed it unfortunately because I was outside giving Chan-Tha her ticket – she was feeling even seedier than me. She’d also been to the dinner, but her condition was compounded by a full week of World Cup watching. Hence she was late to the game. On the other hand I also missed Clinton Young’s reply for Collingwood so I was grateful to Chan-Tha for that.

Eventually we were all seated: Chan-Tha, Oscar, myself, and Julian, a Collingwod fan it’s true, but at least he’d got there early enough to save the seats.

Aside from the free kick decisions, we were able to enjoy a reasonably even first quarter. Both sides took turns to attack and it was only a brace from Breust towards the end of the quarter that gave the Hawks an 8 point lead at quarter time. 

Roughead and Breust both bagged early goals in the second quarter and when even Jonathan Ceglar slotted one the Hawks held a comfy 22 point lead. As I commented on Ceglar’s good recent form, Julian reminded me that Collingwood had discarded him. Even better I thought, as I settled in to enjoy a nice gradual Hawthorn ascendency and eventual victory.

Predictably, the very moment I began to anticipate a carefree afternoon, Collingwood, and in particular, Travis Cloke, mounted a comeback. Two strong marks both resulted in goals, the second of which came right on the siren to make the difference just 9 points. This was enough to get the Magpie fans on their feet to give their team a standing ovation as they jogged from the field, their chins held high and their chests puffed out in acknowledgement of their own magnificence. 

At this point I was quite confident we’d win. One of the things about getting older is that you’ve seen most things before. In this case I’d seen it just last season – Collingwood drawing close on the half-time siren and jogging off as heroes to a rapturous reception, only to get smashed in the third quarter. 

In the third quarter when Schoenmakers dispossessed Lumumba of the ball and Matt Suckling passed to Cyril Rioli by himself in the goal square, I thought the blitz was about to begin. And it did, just not for us. Two goals in two minutes to Collingwood, one to Jamie Elliot from a mark followed by Cloke’s fourth as he rolled it through from near the boundary. Suddenly the difference was just two points! Listening to the baying Collingwood fans I was feeling every bit my age. 

Never a Frown With the Gold and Brown

Brad Sewell had been playing well and he got one back for us to maintain our narrow advantage. Then late in the term the Hawks banged on a few in a quick burst: Breust roved a pack after Hodge bombed one in long, then the Poo, Rioli and Hill combined for a beautiful team goal, and this was followed by the best of all – the Poo climbing high over the back of a pack to drag down a screamer, from which he goaled. Suddenly we were 27 points in front approaching the final break; and despite a late goal to Collingwood, the general consensus was that that the Hawks were unlikely to relinquish their lead. 

Gunston marked and goaled early in the final quarter to emphasise the point.

Cloke scored the next goal and although it kept Collingwood in the game, even Hawthorn fans didn’t begrudge him kicking it. He’d marked wide on the boundary and as he lined up his kick from right on the fence, the big screen showed a Hawthorn fan leaning over and mouthing off in Cloke’s face, doubtless offering the sort of advice that people who have never stepped over the white line feel they are eminently qualified to give - I know, I do it every week. Where I’m perhaps different is that I know enough not to get in the face of one who does, especially one as massive as Travis Cloke. By the time Cloke took his kick, even Hawthorn fans were hoping he’d put it through – just to shut this guy up. When inevitably the ball sailed straight through the middle for his fifth, Cloke offered his interlocutor some of his own advice, which we couldn’t hear but which was nonetheless perfectly clear.

The Pies were still in it at this stage, if only marginally, but what slight chance they had was snuffed out within five minutes when Rioli and then Smith goaled in quick succession.  More goals followed, but the contest was winding down by then and most people’s attention had shifted to being home in the warmth. 

In the end the difference was that Hawthorn played a strong team game with a good spread of contributors, whereas Collingwood relied on the usual group of three or four: Scott Pendlebury, Jamie Elliot, Luke Ball and in particular Travis Cloke. Even though Cloke kicked five and played an excellent match, his opponent, Brian Lake was also good in his first match back since he injured his calf against St.Kilda. 

With key players still missing – Mitchell, Gibson, Stratton, McEvoy – any win is valuable, particularly against the higher ranked teams,  and let’s face it, it’s never a bad thing to beat Collingwood.  

Final scores: Hawthorn 17 13 115 d Collingwood 13 8 86

Ladder position – 2^nd

Attendance – 70,495

What we learned: Many people in AFL circles are lamenting the death of the time-honoured ‘bump’, but in soccer it is the great tradition of the ‘bite’ that is threatened. In its World Cup match in the week after this match, Uruguyan striker Luis Suarez sunk his choppers into Italian defender Gorgio Chielli who immediately went to ground. Suarez has copped a four month suspension for his dietary predilection. What’s surprising is not that he bit the defender, given his form in this area, but that he thought he needed to. After all, you don’t need to bite an Italian footballer for them to go to ground in the box and writhe in agony – it’s a default position for them.

What we already knew: sometimes the old ways are the best ways: team tactics are now more sophisticated, individual skills are more advanced, diet and sports science sustain high performance, even boot technology and jumper fabrics are designed for optimum performance, but one thing which hasn’t changed in over 100 years of football is that Saturday afternoon is the most convenient time to get to the football; hence why more than 70,000 people turned up to watch this match. Next week I note that Collingwood and Carlton play on Sunday night – I can’t even imagine the thinking behind this scheduling.

What we really should have known: Don’t mix champagne, beer and wine over the course of one evening.  You’d think after 50 years, of which 25-30 have been spent with a working knowledge of alcohol, that this lesson might have sunk in…